my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
