i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
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so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
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I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?