So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.