just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
