For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
