you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I just found puke in my bra..
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
