oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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