Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize