I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
