Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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