Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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