I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
