Do you still have your period?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
