He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Randomize
