whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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