found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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