I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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