Christians are straight up FREAKS
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
