I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize