tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize
