Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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