can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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