I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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