Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
