He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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