Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
