I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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