it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
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