I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
