People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
