is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Randomize
