ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Randomize
