Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
