I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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