Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
