I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude