It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
