Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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