Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize