we're blogging at a bar
You can't motorboat a personality
even my farts smell like vagina
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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