After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize