How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
