its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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