Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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