i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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