i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
