Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He shit in the fireplace
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize