that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I need to wash the frat house off of me
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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