we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
