I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
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Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
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You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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