I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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