I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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