This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize